When I was 11 years old I came to a realization: I wanted to be a writer.
I have always been passionate about stories for as long as I could remember. I used to read fiction under the covers with a flashlight late into the night so my parents wouldn’t catch on that I wasn’t sleeping. Instead of doing chores on Saturday mornings, I would hide in my room and turn on the vacuum while I stole the chance to read a chapter or two of my book. My parents had a rule of no TV during lunch break from school (I lived in front of my school building which meant I walked home for lunch the whole time I was in elementary school). When I was done eating, I used to go to the washroom in the basement, and tip toe to the TV in the den to turn it on low volume, just so I could catch my favourite cartoon before I could go back to class.
By the time I was a young preteen, I had my own stories I wanted to put to paper. I would make up worlds, and characters, and plots. I sat and wrote scenes of my stories and shared them with friends. My favourite lunch hour cartoon? It was Sailor Moon, and I was so obsessed with that show I started to draw the characters on any scrap of paper I could find. Adults started noticing, and encouraged me to get into the Arts. So when I started high school, that’s exactly what I did.
I’m now 30 years old and I have “attempted” to be a writer hundreds of times. I came up with a million different excuses: I lack life experience to be able to write anything of value, I have too many incomplete story lines in my head and can’t choose one to start writing, I don’t have the time because I need to work to get myself out of poverty and have some independence and financial stability, I lack the discipline to be able to commit to writing, and on and on I kept making excuses. I have chapters of stories I have started sitting on flash drives that I haven’t touched in years. The biggest excuse I have used is that I just didn’t feel ready.
I have always been complemented on my gift for the written word. Teachers have praised my writing abilities and even used my essays as examples to share with other students. I know I can write, and I know that I’m adequately good at it. Lately, I’ve been having a lot of people compliment my writing, and ask me why I didn’t have a Blog.
Well, I did (read below) but like any other writing project, I never continued it. I stopped writing two years ago when my job switched to full time. But that urge to express myself never went away, and I haven’t really exercised that urge it the most healthy or positive of ways.
I’ve focused my growth in other areas. 2015 has been about advancing my learning and improving my health. I’ve been taking steps to address my Diabetes as I’d never been able to successfully lower my blood sugar. Having extra income from finally working a full time decent job I decided to take a course that has been on my wish list. I’m taking Life Skills Coaching to further develop my facilitation skills. This while living on my own, spending time with my significant other on weekends, working Full Time, and I even did a bit of traveling.
My year is coming to an end, and suddenly, so is my job. My contract expires December 31st, and I’m told it’s not being renewed.
So I’m not only faced with no job, limited income, uncertain future for the New Year, but most notably, a whole lot of free time.
So the I’ve been revisiting the idea of blogging again.
I want to write stories. But I’m no longer a child who wants to escape into a fantasy land and write about heroes and villains and overcoming obstacles, learning magic and sword fighting and slaying dragons.
Wait, that actually sounds like a lot of fun, so I take that back, one day I may write about that.
But there is a new type of story I want to write. Everyday in my profession, in my life, I come across real heroes who’ve faced obstacles in life and whose stories are just as interesting, complex, and ultimately just as if not more beautiful that what you read in a story book.
Those stories are what I really want to write about.
So here’s to my being a blogger, take two!